Larz Zahn Posted December 22, 2008 Author Share Posted December 22, 2008 dont get me wrong. i mean i love my family. an i like to go an do things with them. like go to a movie now an then. or just visit. but i dunno... i dont get into the seasonal events much. i guess you could say im a grinch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Jess♥ Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 i think most people are he he. sometimes when you get events like that, it just gets real stuffy >.< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 Everyone dislikes their families, but we all love to be with each other and we all hate to be around each other Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mirabilis Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 (edited) the more i think about it the more i think that i can be real heartless at times. like right now? i dont really wanna go to texas to visit my brother. nothing against him, we get along fine. for about 5 minutes then we try to kill each other, but what brothers dont? thats cool with me. i just dont wanna leave the things i got planned and wanting to do on the table and head off to texas for a week and do what he thinks is fun, cause what he thinks is cool i find boring, and vice versa, also cool. its always been like taht. of course, i dont think i can stomach being in a close confined area with my parents for too long.. like say................... a car? yeah.. thats just torture.but me being heartless is also like this, i can not stand ceremony. when my family wants to do this real big thing for friends an family, i just shrug it off and go do my own thing. at christmas time, im more than happy to be off in larz lil world than sit around the tree watching old people make stupid corny jokes. cause i hate corny jokes, which is ironic cause i find myself being very corny of late. which of course bothers me. and then theres my birthday. no matter how hard i try i can not get my immediate family to NOT give me some sorta of birthday related event. i dont even want the cake or the presents, i think i asked begged pleaded an even bribed them to not do anything or get me anything this year... will it happen? no.. so it makes less than happy to see that one day come around.. i dont know why but i simply do not like my bday.. i dont care for presents... i guess i dont like the attention directed at me. I do know exactly what you mean. But I have my own view of heartlessness. Take for example what happened today. I learned something about myself, I actually enjoyed causeing emotional harm to my family. I get happy and pleasure when I do that. And whats more I hate it when my mother shows afection to my newphew, I cant stand it. I had to put on my headphones and listen to underoath and other heavy chaotic music. I dont know, I have to be around chaos for some reason it just...makes me calm...me happy. I was talking to my brother in the theater today about death and he yelled at me because I told him he didnt know anything about it, and he said one of his closest friends commited suicide. I told him one of our cousins died two summers ago but he wouldnt know that. I also told him it was probably a good thing that his friend commited suicide because now he doesnt have to deal with the problems of our world. He is now in complete peace and harmony. I dont know, but thats how I see death, I am not afraid of it, and I embrace it. I think its beatiful, everyone is so afraid and scared of death, but you have to see past that, it is just a journey to a better life...a life of no worries, no pain, no grief or sorrow. Everyone will be happy. Quote from LotR "Death is just another path in life, one that we all must take." I dont know, but I dont regret saying that to my brother, I dont know what to feel right now, if I should be concerend that I feel that way, or if that is ok and just be who I am. I mean I actually enjoy cause pain and suffering to other, emotional pain anyways. I know me and my brother used to fight alot, I mean alot. And he would always make fun of me, and run me in the dirt. Even told me he hated me because I was born. Because of that, I now feel completely empty, I mean I am fricken hollow. I dont know. I could keep going on, trust me. But I dont want to freak you guys out. I perhaps i've already said too much. I dont know, i guess we can all find out from the feedback lol. Sorry if I offended anyone, And I dont feel this way about everyone, just certain people, anyways...Merry Christmas lol. Edited December 25, 2008 by Mirabilis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 You are both weird Funny thing happened to me this weekend: it starts snowing real hard in my area and my mom calls me and tells me she needs me to drive up to her store. I say, whatever, free lunch. I start driving and I get to this turn and all of a sudden, I lose traction and veere off the road! I sideswipe this street sign that smacks off my side mirror and sends it crashing through my passenger window! Glass is everywhere and all I'm thinking is, "Damn I'm like an inch away from that tree, damn I'm lucky!" I get the car out onto the road but the trouble has just begun. I get stuck in the dip inbetween the two hills that make up the road. So after a half hour of trying to get myself out I called my mom and waited for help. Now you think when you've got your emergency flashers on people no you're in distress but no. People start honking at me because I'm taking up a lane! After an hour and a half of being stuck in the 20 degree snow with an open window, my mom shows up and can't the car up the hill! I'm pretty much a walking frosty the snowman at this point so we go home and warm up and try again. I got stuck at 12pm, the car got home a 6pm! It was stuck for six hours with an open window. Needless to say, it felt and looked like an icebox. Thankfully it just came back from the shop today and its all fixed. In case no one knows, I hate the snow!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Jess♥ Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 we all have a path in life, and life can be difficult, but if we end that path prematurely, we have to repeat it again. our soul has decided before we were born what trials we wish to experience and as a result gain great strength.. if we do not complete the trial, we come back and try again. also yes if we feel hollow inside, we want to fill that with something. justice is a good powerful feeling. it can be like a kind of a drug. the only thing that will ever fill that void for good is love. maybe love for yourself, or love for a god or belief system. if you can hurt the one who hurt you, you get justice and that feels good. it's natural. I do know exactly what you mean. But I have my own view of heartlessness. Take for example what happened today. I learned something about myself, I actually enjoyed causeing emotional harm to my family. I get happy and pleasure when I do that. And whats more I hate it when my mother shows afection to my newphew, I cant stand it. I had to put on my headphones and listen to underoath and other heavy chaotic music. I dont know, I have to be around chaos for some reason it just...makes me calm...me happy. I was talking to my brother in the theater today about death and he yelled at me because I told him he didnt know anything about it, and he said one of his closest friends commited suicide. I told him one of our cousins died two summers ago but he wouldnt know that. I also told him it was probably a good thing that his friend commited suicide because now he doesnt have to deal with the problems of our world. He is now in complete peace and harmony. I dont know, but thats how I see death, I am not afraid of it, and I embrace it. I think its beatiful, everyone is so afraid and scared of death, but you have to see past that, it is just a journey to a better life...a life of no worries, no pain, no grief or sorrow. Everyone will be happy. Quote from LotR "Death is just another path in life, one that we all must take." I dont know, but I dont regret saying that to my brother, I dont know what to feel right now, if I should be concerend that I feel that way, or if that is ok and just be who I am. I mean I actually enjoy cause pain and suffering to other, emotional pain anyways. I know me and my brother used to fight alot, I mean alot. And he would always make fun of me, and run me in the dirt. Even told me he hated me because I was born. Because of that, I now feel completely empty, I mean I am fricken hollow. I dont know. I could keep going on, trust me. But I dont want to freak you guys out. I perhaps i've already said too much. I dont know, i guess we can all find out from the feedback lol. Sorry if I offended anyone, And I dont feel this way about everyone, just certain people, anyways...Merry Christmas lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 25, 2008 Author Share Posted December 25, 2008 wow bk, thats a pretty bad day you had. luckily for me it dont snow hardly at all here. miribilis... im pretty sure if i saw u in life. i'd be scared lol. i really wish i had some catchy or snappy words of wisdom to throw in there, but im afraid i got the short end of the stick on that deal. the only thing i do know is that i have a very different outlook on death, and suicide in general. but then again i believe in heaven an hell, so its not that i fear death. sometimes i welcome it, because days are hard sometimes an i believe my soul is right, so if i do die then in know where im going. but on the flip side... i know if i die now, i miss out on some great things that will happen. whether it be a new movie, or a new friend, or just one of those happy moments of life you treasure. so i guess in a way i do look forward to the end of my human suffering, but i also look forward to te joys that my life will bring. so death will come for me on its own time. i dont have to rush. its on its way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 Just live yur life the way you want don't care about what will happen when it all ends. If you dwell on the ending you'll miss out on the story and you'll never know how you got to the end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mirabilis Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 wow bk, thats a pretty bad day you had. luckily for me it dont snow hardly at all here.miribilis... im pretty sure if i saw u in life. i'd be scared lol. i really wish i had some catchy or snappy words of wisdom to throw in there, but im afraid i got the short end of the stick on that deal. the only thing i do know is that i have a very different outlook on death, and suicide in general. but then again i believe in heaven an hell, so its not that i fear death. sometimes i welcome it, because days are hard sometimes an i believe my soul is right, so if i do die then in know where im going. but on the flip side... i know if i die now, i miss out on some great things that will happen. whether it be a new movie, or a new friend, or just one of those happy moments of life you treasure. so i guess in a way i do look forward to the end of my human suffering, but i also look forward to te joys that my life will bring. so death will come for me on its own time. i dont have to rush. its on its way. I understand that, thats a pretty good way to view things in my opion. And you dont have to worry about being scared if you saw me lol. I am not decked out in peircing and chains and stuff like some gothic and hardcore rockers do. I do like to wear black, but I dont like peircings personally. And I am working on growing out my hair in the front, trying to grow a "Suenamei". others may know this as a "Seencut" if you still dont know what this style is just look at Zoalord Li Yentsui in his human form. He's the one that wanted me to grow that out, I saw him and was like "Hey! Thats a sweet Haircut! I want that style of hair!" lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mirabilis Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 we all have a path in life, and life can be difficult, but if we end that path prematurely, we have to repeat it again. our soul has decided before we were born what trials we wish to experience and as a result gain great strength.. if we do not complete the trial, we come back and try again. also yes if we feel hollow inside, we want to fill that with something. justice is a good powerful feeling. it can be like a kind of a drug. the only thing that will ever fill that void for good is love. maybe love for yourself, or love for a god or belief system. if you can hurt the one who hurt you, you get justice and that feels good. it's natural. Thanks Ryuki, for such wisdom. I do aprreciate it so. Just live yur life the way you want don't care about what will happen when it all ends. If you dwell on the ending you'll miss out on the story and you'll never know how you got to the end. Yes BK you too have words that speak from the heart, mind, and soul. Thnx all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 Bananas are full of wisdom, so what are you guys doing on christmas? In a couple of hours I'll be gorging on some good old chinese food and seeing tom cruise try and kill hitler! Indeed its a good christmas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Jess♥ Posted December 25, 2008 Share Posted December 25, 2008 Just live yur life the way you want don't care about what will happen when it all ends. If you dwell on the ending you'll miss out on the story and you'll never know how you got to the end. very wise words here dude Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Like I said, we bananas are very wise people. Try listening to what a banana has to say next time you come across one. It may turn your whole world upside down Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Jess♥ Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 you have no idea how relevant that is, what you just said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mirabilis Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Like I said, we bananas are very wise people. Try listening to what a banana has to say next time you come across one. It may turn your whole world upside down heh, I am sorry Banana King, but my older brother says that your empire will be pealed by his nation...the nation of Prestonia! He says that he will destroy you and your banana folk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 Can your brother hurl the moon at me?! Cause I can to him, and there ain't no dodging that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 26, 2008 Author Share Posted December 26, 2008 im sure if someone started doing what a banana says they'll be hurled in the looney bin. (which is where i believe bk really is) i had a quiet christmas. not a lot of family chatter. it was pleasant enough. although i went to get a glass of milk, cause i drink a small glass when my throat burns, but my bro in law brought a jug of home made eggnog in a milk jug... i grabbed the wrong jug. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 We saw Valkyrie, and it was pretty good. It was a bit slow and not a lot of action but it was really suspenseful Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 26, 2008 Author Share Posted December 26, 2008 any good dogfights? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 No, unless you count american planes blowing german battalions to hell in the first five minutes. It was mostly a lot of suspense in trying to make their assassination plan go perfect. Its funny, there was a point in the movie that made you think, "Wow, it worked! They did it, now what do they do?" But then again, we all know that's not how hitler ended... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 27, 2008 Author Share Posted December 27, 2008 well heck... no good dogfights... there aint no point in me seeing this now. im not big on wwII to begin with, an the only reason i why i thought to see this one was the flight scenes. oh wells. im havin an ok holiday i guess. im puttin my application at the hospital where my dad works. and at a electric company. they say i should start off at $22 an hour after a 5 month probation... but i dont know all that goes with the job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 Well at least you're getting a good job. My boss just told me she can't put me back on because she has no position for me...so now I'm back to my really crappy job at the newspaper factory Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 27, 2008 Author Share Posted December 27, 2008 i dont have it yet, and truth to tell if it has to do with heights i cant get it. thats why im leavin the job i have now, among other reasons actually, but the vertigo was the killing stroke. so i can choose from the electric company, or go for the hospital maintaince. both jobs are almost twice what im making now.. which is bare minimum. so what goes on at a news paper factory anyhow? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*BananaKing Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 We print papers and put them on a truck for shipping....pretty basic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larz Zahn Posted December 28, 2008 Author Share Posted December 28, 2008 hehe. i just had a flash back to the movie "newsies" i dont know if ya saw it or not, but i bet your glad its not like that anymore. tho it was a good movie. a young christian bale at work. i dont know if i could make it in a factory climate workplace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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