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How easily are you Offended


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With the digital age, everybody can now be easily heard.  Now that social media is the norm, everybody can freely express themselves.  But is this a good thing?  The ease of communicating also brought about lesser inhibition.  Introverts are now a thing of the past.  People now are easier to offend.

I wonder how this came about.  Were people really easy to offend to begin with and was just amplified by the digital age?  Or was it because the boom of the internet failed to prepare the emotional state of a person?  Did parents then fail to realize the effect of leaving their children to the internet that paved the way to those kids growing up to be emotionally fragile?  What happened to us?

I remember a time when people would call me names and I would just laugh it off.  Now you call that bullying.  If you do something out of good will but others see it differently, you get lambasted for it.  

That's why I stay away from all forms of social media.  It's too damn tiring to squabble when you can do something much more productive.

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13 hours ago, durendal said:

People now are easier to offend.

That's true. A lot of people are easily offended. Sometimes you don't have to try. Just look at these women. They're called Karens. They get mad over nothing! and you deal with them on Online games, in public, on forums, Karens are everywhere. 

 

and this.

 

 

Edited by Jupiter
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It really depends. if somebody says something that is not true and it is well known that it is not true, then there is no threat to me.
on the other hand, if I think there is a chance people will believe it and through believing it, will potentially cause harm to me, then I will be offended and I will fight to restore my honour.

for example, if I am in a room at a job interview, and somebody says "that girl is a slut", then that will offend me far more, since there is a chance the interviewers might believe it and I will lose the interview.  But if I am on the street an a random stranger calls me a slut,  I just assume they have some personal issue they need to work through and ignore them.

The internet can amplify this. if somebody says something that might be harmful against a sub culture that is already  under attack, well if it goes unchallenged, then the zeitgeist can move to a state where this subculture can be in an even worse off position in law and society.
In this day and age, and individual's words can be far more damaging than they may have been in the past, before social media. these echo chambers can amplify a message and this can turn into a war of words or a war of concepts.

Edited by Tora Tan
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On 11/1/2020 at 9:51 AM, Tora Tan said:

The internet can amplify this. if somebody says something that might be harmful against a sub culture that is already  under attack, well if it goes unchallenged, then the zeitgeist can move to a state where this subculture can be in an even worse off position in law and society.
In this day and age, and individual's words can be far more damaging than they may have been in the past, before social media. these echo chambers can amplify a message and this can turn into a war of words or a war of concepts.

 

Yes, that's what I'm talking about.  Because of the internet, people can have a conversation with anybody without being shy.  Eliminating a face to face discussion puts less pressure on people to communicate properly, more often, saying things without inhibition.  Like what Salkafar has quoted, people now eliminates the possibility that they will get punched for disrespecting people.

I also don't get why it is so easy to disrespect people.  I understand that when you are angry, you say hurtful things.  This is caused by an emotional response.  But does that mean that most everyone online are angry all the time?  Well, that's what it looked like to me.

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I think they probably are.
People are angry from their day job, they are stressed and ready to explode all the time, they turn cruel. I myself can turn cruel on very rare occasions, if I am in a really bad way.
There is a mental health crisis in many countries.

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On 11/6/2020 at 8:49 AM, Tora Tan said:


People are angry from their day job, they are stressed and ready to explode all the time, they turn cruel. I myself can turn cruel on very rare occasions, if I am in a really bad way.
 

My marriage turned me into a bitter person. My ex wife and my in-laws convinced me that I was unstable and that I was crazy.  I went to see councilors and therapists. Eventually my therapist became convinced that it was my marriage that was the problem. He became convinced that I didn't need the medication anymore either. He even suggested marital counseling before. However when I told my therapist about my wife cheating on me and us living in the same apartment. He noticed I was at my limit. So 3 months after the divorce was finalized. I quit taking my medication. I only agreed to seek help for myself and take medication because I thought it was save a toxic marriage. It was pointless now. No point. Now today, in the present. I feel 100% better. I know now that I don't have drama and a screaming fight between me and a woman waiting for me when I get home. I know I can rest and do what I want. 

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6 hours ago, Jupiter said:

My marriage turned me into a bitter person. My ex wife and my in-laws convinced me that I was unstable and that I was crazy.  I went to see councilors and therapists. Eventually my therapist became convinced that it was my marriage that was the problem. He became convinced that I didn't need the medication anymore either. He even suggested marital counseling before. However when I told my therapist about my wife cheating on me and us living in the same apartment. He noticed I was at my limit. So 3 months after the divorce was finalized. I quit taking my medication. I only agreed to seek help for myself and take medication because I thought it was save a toxic marriage. It was pointless now. No point. Now today, in the present. I feel 100% better. I know now that I don't have drama and a screaming fight between me and a woman waiting for me when I get home. I know I can rest and do what I want. 

You see, that's just the thing.  You mention you were a bitter person, but none of us think that you were (presuming everyone agrees).  Years into this board and I haven't seen you being toxic.  In fact, instead of lashing out, you reached out.  It just the way how people handle themselves.  Some may be nice, prim and proper offline, but when they get online, they suddenly turn into trolls.  It's like how a mild mannered person could turn into a road maniac when they are behind a steering wheel.  Though I am guilty of that sometimes, but that usually happens when intensely provoked.   This quote, which I'm not sure if it was really Keanu Reeves who said it, but it resonates with me:

Quote

I'm at that stage of my life where I keep myself out of arguments.  Even if you tell me 1+1=5, you're absolutely correct, enjoy.

I can't say that it's an age thing, as I also see people who are older than me that says the damnedest things.  Could it be that people now are much more opinionated, that they malign anyone who simply disagrees with them?  I get how heated debates can become, but to the point of insulting?  

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15 hours ago, durendal said:

You see, that's just the thing.  You mention you were a bitter person, but none of us think that you were (presuming everyone agrees).  Years into this board and I haven't seen you being toxic.  In fact, instead of lashing out, you reached out.  It just the way how people handle themselves.  Some may be nice, prim and proper offline, but when they get online, they suddenly turn into trolls. 


from the very beginning, my philosophy with this forum was to ensure everyone was listened to and respected.
Jupiter, I can't recall too well, but I remember when you first came here, there must have been a reason why I started talking to you via pm? do you think you were disruptive back then? or was there another reason?
in any case, there has been a number of VERY disruptive and toxic people in the history of the forum, but with every single case, I took the effort to talk to them, to understand why they were behaving that way and try and help them to be nicer to others.
I think I only failed one time.  I remember that clearly.. their name and avatar was something to do with tropical fruit? or hawaii?  it's hard to remember.
 

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Offense is truly subjective. Emotions are as well. We all have the right to live as we like. Barring hurting others, stealing, killing, or sad to even have to say, harming children. As we all have that right, others have a right to disagree. The issue is not in disagreement,  but with the thought process of feeling the need to voice or act upon it. The truly boring care what others do as they have nothing to focus on (apparently) in their own lives. Then, on the opposite side people feel the need to rub in the face of society their beliefs or lifestyles. All this division is merely distraction. Distraction from leading your own life and being happy. My view, as small as it admittedly is... is that I don't really care what others do or say. To care one way or another is to accept their beliefs or give credence to their nonsense. The day will hopefully come when we can all agree that it doesn't matter. Offense, preaching, philosophizing... everyone be good to everyone. The ones you can't be good to, steer clear of. Life's too short to be spent worrying about the vast majority of people you will never know, their opinions or anything else.

 

Wait... what happened? What I meant to say was Guyver is awesome and I cant wait for it to come back!! 

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On 11/13/2020 at 10:18 AM, Jess♥ said:


Jupiter, I can't recall too well, but I remember when you first came here, there must have been a reason why I started talking to you via pm? do you think you were disruptive back then? or was there another reason?
 

 At the time I was desperate to have someone that I could talk to. I took you as someone I could talk to, and I don't regret it at all. It was one of the best decisions I made. I was having some marital issues even then, as well as the marriage was taking it's toll on me.  It was making me mentally unstable. Talking to you really helped me get through some of it.

But years later. It all got worse. After filing for divorce and it becoming final and moving on in life. I'm stronger mentally and emotionally now. I realize now that I really was with a manipulative and toxic woman that just used me up.  However, what worries me now is. I don't know if I have the strength to be in a relationship. Sure, I'd love to be with someone. But after awhile, it seems like every woman I've been with just wears me down eventually and the relationship just goes downhill from there. 

Edited by Jupiter
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