Looking for input on a Guyver fanfic I'm working on.

[PowerofGuyver]

Hello Guyver fans, new guy here. Found this place recently, and wanted to discuss a Guyver story I've been playing around with for the past few days. Looking for constructive criticism and pointers. Mainly on two changes I've been thinking up.

So first off, this is I guess what some could call "an American reboot/adaption". Following the story from the first view manga volumes/anime. But set in America with American characters, with some exceptions, still working out finer details.

Now come my two changes. First we have storage of the Guyver unit. In this story, instead of being stored in the sub dimension, the armor is stored inside the users body, kinda like the movies, that's how I always saw it. With the tendrils going in and out of Sean's receivers. Inside their bodies, you'd see vast super thin tendrils from brain to toes, this is the inactive state. The user will still call upon it however. When activated, the armor erupts from the receiver ports on the back of the neck, or back, not sure which location I like better, though I am leaning towards back of the neck. Soon as the armor is called upon, it will instantly being "molting" and growing on the users body. And there ya have it. Thoughts on this? I'm going this route to dive in into Guyver's symbiotic nature and really explore it as a living thing.

The second change is the Gigantic Guyver. Whereas in the manga, the Gigantic Guyver is an add on from a Creator ship. In my story, to once again explore the nature of the Guyver's organic being, the unit will "evolve" or "mature" into the Gigantic Guyver.

So those are my two changes, well...besides being in America and what not. I am deciding on what to do with the "bio boosting" feature. The removal of organs and such. Personally I am leaning towards not using it, or putting a new spin on it. Changes that I've thought of for that might be things like, no longer needing to eat or sleep. Therefore the host has new faults and can always be alert and ready, at the behest of the unit. But I'm still deciding. It was never explored in the first OVA anime, nor movies. So it might just not bothered with.

I've shares these changes with two other Guyver fans at another forum, and they were into it. So i thought I'd seek our more fans and gather more opinions and ideas. I hope some of you out there will like the ideas as aeell, and perhpss aid me in more development. Thank you for your time.

[river_chaos]

It sounds interesting enough.  I'm more interested in plots of a story, but you seem to have a good idea of where you're taking this. 

[PowerofGuyver]

It sounds interesting enough. I'm more interested in plots of a story, but you seem to have a good idea of where you're taking this.

Thank you. Everyday I'm thinking and adding more. I do have some of it written out, mainly the intro. It's the test type zoanoid, whom I've named Victor, trying to escape and getting caught my Gregole and the other Chronos soldiers. No action yet, just some some talking and slight world building. But I'll get there. Thank you for the response.

[Salkafar]

There is the 'mass problem': if the Guyver is inside the user when inactive, what happens when it comes out? Does the wearer shrink?

[PowerofGuyver]

There is the 'mass problem': if the Guyver is inside the user when inactive, what happens when it comes out? Does the wearer shrink?

Well the inactive form is just vast array of tendrils but they're very very small and thin. Given the alien nature, they occupy the body, but do not add noticeable increase mass.

I'm not admittedly versed in biology mind you. But yeah, increase inass won't be an issue.

[PowerofGuyver]

Well, I didn't expect this to happen. Ever since the annoucement of the Figma Guyver IIF, I returned to my American Guyver adaption story from so long ago. Over the past few days I've been creating more, haven't written much yet except for a prologue that is a re-telling of the test type Zoanoid stealing the Guyver units, and encountering Gregole.

Here are some bullet points. This thread is dead, but I just wanted to post it anyway.

 

Quote

 

*Guyver unit is stored within body of the host, as vast array of tendrils. Borrowed from the list very action movie Guyver and Guyver 2: Dark Hero.

 

*Borrows numerous elements of anime and manga, set within the US, eventually the story will go world wide.

 

*Chronos a very public corporation, known as Max Pharmaceuticals to the public. Numerous branches world wide. Considered a leading entity in medicines and technology. Zoanoids and genetic experiments hidden from public.

 

*Main character is Elliot Easton, 16 year old high schooler, counter to Sho Fukamachi.

 

*Gigantic Guyver is the adult stage of the Guyver unit.

 

*Agito Makashima not a high school student, but one of Sho's teachers. Still the user of Guyver Unit III, origin and place in story mainly the same.

 

 

Edited June 1, 2019 by PowerofGuyver

[Sully]

The only problem I've with it is by changing it so their is "no boost dimension" you've effectively nerfed the Guyver. This is why I'd not go too far into "Amercian'ising" the tech of the story as you'll end up with more explaining than writing. 

All Guyvers defectively have a power link to the Boost Dimension through their gravity controller and that is where they get a lot of their power from so they go way beyond that of a normal zoanoid.

Chronos wasn't their public arm, it's Max Pharmaceuticals (which was used in the movies too). 

Guyver Units don't grow old, the Control medal didn't magic up a 3rd layer of a control medal it got it from the Relic. If you're going to change things around, use the Utah Relic. If it was actually sent back to the "Creators" we'd all be dead as they'd realise they messed up and we'd have another planetiod about to drop on our heads. 

Aside from that it's an interesting idea.

 

[PowerofGuyver]

Coming back to this, again, necro posting... forgive me.

 

When it comes to removing the boost dimension, this idea mainly comes from the American films, which had a slightly higher impact on me growing up, versus the animes. In the movies, while not explicitly stated, to me, had the Guyver armor stored inside Sean Barker's body. After his transformation, with the thugs in the alley, the armor breaks off, and the tendrils all shoot back into the neck bumps (receivers). In Dark Hero, if you look closely, when Sean transforms, the armor is seen shooting out where the receivers are, and the tendrils are connecting the pieces to the receivers. 

So that is why I implemented this idea. Personally i somewhat prefer it over the anime/manga, but that's me. I use this idea to also further cement the idea of the Guyver armor, while being a terrifying weapon, also being a living parasitic organism, it lives in the host. 

 

So that's my justification for that. Just wanted to share it.

 

As for the Gigantic Guyver being an "adult" stage, I have been rethinking that. I'm more comfortable with the Gigantic being like it's treated in the manga, a super upgrade add on of sorts. But I'm considering changing the origins somewhat. I'm liking the idea of the Gigantic being a type of over drive mode, already installed on the Guyver unit, but locked away. Will keep playing with ideas.

 

As for Chronos and Max Pharmaceuticals, that was just a huge error on my part. I had forgot about Max Pharmaceuticals, so it will be changed.

Edited May 21, 2017 by PowerofGuyver

[Guyver0]

I thought Max Pharmaceuticals wasn't referenced in the live movie adaptations.  Everyone was calling Chronos "Kronos".

[PowerofGuyver]

Well, I'm still working on this little project of mine, albeit slowly, and only when a Guyver mood strikes me.

Anyway, I've been working on a commission with an artist over at DeviantArt to bring my new Guyver design to life. Taking elements from some of the designs, merging them. I decided on

 

Guyver 1 colors

Guyver 0 vent and sonic orb placement

Guyver 1 eyes

Guyver III arm elbow blades

 

It's not done yet, but the rough draft came out fine.

[Anxiety]

Well, I'm intrigued. I can't wait to see the drawings you're having commissioned and the story if you ever feel up to sharing.

If you're going with the internal Guyver aspect, I'd put the receivers on the neck. Putting it on the back would result in issues calling the Guyver while wearing a shirt. Of course, it could almost be interesting to go one step farther. Instead of being two on the neck, it might interesting to have more than one receiver that completely rips off the clothes, resulting in something similar to Guyver IIF from the manga. It would make more sense, to me, to have multiple receivers as the whole armor coming out of two small holes on the neck is a little silly... in a way sillier than the extra dimensional stuff from the manga, I think.

I'd be interested in the changes to Gigantic. If it is an "adult" form of the Guyver, would that mean there would be no "standard" Guyver once it matured? An overdrive would be interesting and could have added issues of the effects an "overdrive" could have in terms of stamina/energy consumption resulting in a type of "overheating" scenario with a race against the clock to finish the enemy before he ran out.

Is Agito still working from within Chronos if he's a teacher? I always liked that aspect, personally.

[PowerofGuyver]

So here is the commission I had done. This is how Guyver I looks in my story. Sorry for being so late. It's hard to maintain a Guyver mood these days given the series is dead.

https://www.deviantart.com/emilystepp/art/Guyver-Extreme-Concept-Commission-802115883